Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Sun Sign = Sun-ny Side up!! ??


“I tell you he is insufferable, you heard that in-suf-frable.. and pig-headed, you heard that piiiiiiiig- headed”
“I agree, what else can you expect from a Cancerian”

At this I had the misfortune of being in the path of the two warring ladies.
“What do you say?” the second lady glared at me, almost daring me to say to something.

“I don’t know” I fumbled.
… I might have tapped a Nuclear reactor.
“You don’t know, You d-o-n-t know, ....how can someone …does he think he is god….he must imagine all are fools…these Cancerians I tell you…” the rants went on.

Two most dangerous colleagues of mine where chewing up some one and to decipher the cause for it would mean several hours of ear bleed.
I didn’t have the guts to walk away and face the aftermath of the torrents of hell, so I stood there patiently for the ladies to stop.
They had to!
Come now, everybody needs to breathe!

“Well..what were you saying?” One of them looked at me.
“I said I dunno”
A shrill “What???” came out and I could see the lady was collecting enough air in the lungs to go on for another 10 minutes non-stop.

In lightening speed I dived at this interval to give my two-bit ….

“I meant I don’t know what to expect from a Cancerian”
One of the ladies softly murmured “God! You don’t? A disbeliever of Linda Goodman???”
“That’s all we need now!”
“We should be going now” with those final words both the ladies vanished, This time around I must’ve definitely caused the second nuclear reactor to go off.

This exchange left me in deep thought.
I realize I am a depraved human. And nothing is going to change me.
And so I have decided to warn everyone of the depths of my depravity.

Yup!
1. I disbelieve in Linda Good-whatshername!

2. I am completely ignorant of the star signs and their relevant month and am dead sure that I will never figure out sun sign / star sign / moon sign as quickly as I can figure out Differential Calculus

3. I have no clue what a cusp can do!

4. I don’t know if Aquarian is compatible for Taurus or Capricorn or Sagittarius or Leo or any other! Help! I might marry the wrong man!

5. Scorpio means an insect in American English, Of course they have dropped the “n” out of it, its like dropping the “u” outta colours ..er colors!!

6. I don’t know if Piscians burp every time they eat noodles!

7. I believe Virgo means fear of heights, Who left out the "t" and "i"?

8. Lastly Zodiac is a Men's clothing store!!

24 comments:

S said...

lol, me too me too...

But yes I love listening about the sun signs and forget them very easily....

U have such colleagues??? :D

Come join ma office ;)

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Heheh... yeah it is very confusing indeed. It is always interesting for me, though to read the horoscope in a newspaper when someone else is reading theirs. Once I had actually skipped two signs ahead and told a girl the predictions about a completely different zodiac, and she really believed me. Given the vague way they are written, I don't think it matters anyway. Most of the time it can be a very good way of justifying your actions -- "Oh yes of course you are a Libra" and get away with stuff :P

WhatsInAName said...

lololol
Too good.... I never believe in them either and does being a capricorn give me capris or give me corns?

zulu said...

i too dont believe in linda whateverhername is... !

and now u have to tell me from where the hell u get these ideas ...virgo is fear of heights..oh...gawd !!!

good good !

cheers
aditya

Oxymoronic said...

Awesome... :)

U do not have to believe in linda good whatshername. Yes, u can be ignorant of these stuffs. Like its life or death kinda thingie, ah!!!

Now, I am not gonna say the cliched up-market stuff that, "Oh I too don't believe in these things". Not that I believe.. Its just it doesnt matter to me AT ALL, but yes I won't lie to the fact that I indeed read horoscope if my eyes catch them accidentally.. We all do including you, and those who say they dont read even once in a while when eyes chanced upon such things are lying from their teeth.

Anniyan said...

Linda Who-what? I am as confused about sun-sign/star sign or whatever they are. I still can't figure out the difference between them. But people who put so much faith in these things should try acting themselves rather than acting according to what a jobless female wrote/said about something which might be out of many peoples' league. I am a Cancerian for god's sake! I know this cos my friend told me how to find out what sun sign you are. But I am still lost as ever. Anyway, I don't like the attitude of your colleagues. Sorry if I am very frank. But that's how I am. I dunno if that is how a Cancerian is supposed to behave or not. But to hell with it. I don't care.

mystiquedew said...

S,

Me too I guess..

Nope not colleagues! a slight distortation of some other incident!

Done :)

Sudipta,

heheheheh.

I know its an easy line works everywhere...sadly I can never remember the characteristics of each sunsign

whatsinaname,
:D

Neither only gives you a Bday in June I think :)

Zulu,

Thanks, Glad you liked it.

Guess me being a Virgo it happened :)

Oxy,

Yea..i read it too sometimes..manytimes I can pass it as well..coz most of the lines jus seem the same everyday to me :D

Aniyan,

Din mean to offend you, the whole post was intended towards my ignorance about the sun-signs.

Absolutely no intentions to attack any sun sign :)

Oxymoronic said...

LOl, yes almost same.. u should read the ones which comes on Orkut. You will possibly fall from your chair.

"You will have comfortable old age" is there every alternate day on my Orkut profile. Haha.. now that can mean many things...

Anniyan said...

@mystique
None taken. Its alright. I was irritated because of all the superstitions that still exist in the world.

urs truly said...

if u really do believe in signs and such, its more of a science then an art. the predictions should vary according to the place of the person... however, this general info published should be taken with loads of salt as the info is the same w/o considering the location of the person and other factors into account.

If u see carefully over time, they will have a few standard words that are juggled around - usually intended the reader to feel good abt themselves - a person not feeling good is bad for business... - to make it believeble, throw ina caveat from time to time and tell them 'be careful, you'll meet with an accident" - Imagine if this were true, then 1/12th of the population should meet with an accident and what a coincidence it'll be if all of them are from the same sign :P

just another marketing gimmick by the papers to rope in a few gullible believers!

avdi said...

Lovey, you have just tried to kick Linda Goodman in the stomach.. good thing she has been dead for years or it would have hurt ..

Astrology is a billiiiion dollar industry. As for the people magnet factor, just try dropping the line - I can read palms - n see people converging on you n lapping up all you have to say.

indiapavan said...

@urs truly
Astrology is not only in the papers. If you observe carefully, it has been existent for several millennia. According to me, it is just a method of predicting something based on only SOME factors. Ex: I could predict the outcome of a Formula-1 race even before it starts. Here I consider only the driver's talents. Not the other factors like rain, engine damage, track temperature, etc.

Get what I am saying? However, in Hindu mythology, they predict your whole life based on the time of birth, location, planetary alignment, etc. This I have found is actually more accurate than other ways. Again, I am not saying it is 100% accurate. It cannot be explained. But when my uncle(who is a very good astrologer apparently) called me up one day and told me I would meet with an accident and hurt my left leg very badly. Guess what? It happened the next day. I actually heeded his warning and was driving slowly. But a drunkard made a blind turn and hit me. And I fractured my left ankle. Talk about coincidence... :|

mystiquedew said...

Oxy,

My orkut predictions today say "You will be fortunate in everything"

:D
Right I am getting myself a lottery fer 100000000000 rupees

Anniyan,

*smiles*

Urs Truly,

Yup! There is so much of predictions stuff floating, more fake than not.
Can't seem to figure it at all
Ty for the visit

mystiquedew said...

Avdi,

Nope...I respect anyone who made that mucho money :D : D :D

Would I be thulped senseless if I say I also disbelieve in Nostradamus..

:D :D :D

mystiquedew said...

indiapavan,

Yups, sometimes its uncanny how a few people can say exactly what is going to happen...

Trust you had no serious injuries and have recovered from the accident :)

Ty for the visit :)

indiapavan said...

@Mystique
Nothing serious. Btw, it happened a year ago. And it was just a hair-line fracture. Thank you for your concern. And you are always welcome. Added you to my blogroll.

vimmuuu said...

I dont believe in any kind of predictions, be it Zodiacs or our Indian Kundalis. But its fun reading them over the net or through the paper; especially reading an expired forecast.

Good post and how jobless are your colleagues !!!!

vimmuuu said...

Btw, just added you to my blogroll.

Anonymous said...

't' and 'e', right?

-GR

mystiquedew said...

Indiapavan,

:)
Thanks added ye too :)

Vimmu,
Yups, glad ye liked it :) Added you too :)

Grim,

*grins* Damnnnnnnnnn! did ye haveta find my ghastly mistake.
But heyy trust u to find it :)

Ty for the visit:)

Mama - Mia said...

hahahahahaha!!

very cool woman!

i dabble in it once in a while! and pick all the good things an arien can have!! yeah yeah i KNOW my sunsign! ;)

and say things like ariens ARE impatient when you blow your top too quickly!

otha than that, its just sheer entertainment!!

cheers!

abha

couchpapaya said...

lol ... when someone says 'u must be a xxx' in that knowing manner is the cue for me to zone out! me says ur colleagues have too much time on their hands !!

glad i found ur blog ms. dew, linking u up (whether ya like it or not :) .....

/p

Varun said...

Completely awesome... I hate it when people ask my date of birth and then intelligently find my sun sign and ask are you a saggi?? talk about dropping letters... :)

Palma said...

This is great info to know.